What was your favorite color or Crayola crayon growing up?
White. It was like an eraser but not.
Would you go streaking across a football field during a game for a million dollars knowing theres a 50/50 chance youll get arrested for indecent exposure?
Depends on the predicted scentence. Up to two and a half months, probably
If you were president for the day, what one thing would you change about the country?
The president can't get shit done in a day. I probably would've signed out of TPP, if Trump hadn't.
Describe your own personal hell.
I don't need to. It's called college-level math.
How many slices of pizza are you capable of eating in one sitting?
The whole thing because I'm a goddamn fatass.
Would you rather be a hobbit or an elf for 24 hours?
Pfft. By Tolkien logic, Elves live like forever, therefore 24 hours is like months.
How would you describe yourself in three words?
Whats the weirdest dream youve ever had?
One where I was in the payday universe and facefucked a police officer during timestop. Or the one where some fat black dude shoved his ass in my face by accident and then the Higgs Boson (named "Jeremy") showed me the universe. It was a shitty macro view though so it wasn't particularly interesting. I have no idea what the meanings of these dreams are.
If you found out you were the direct descendant of a king or queen, would that boost your self esteem or have no affect on you at all?
I'd be happy to use it for cool points but not much else
What fashion trend do you wish would go away?
None. What's crazy now is chic tomorrow. I appreciate all fashion trends.
What insect do you wish would completely go extinct?
Fire ants, but only because they were finally renamed to spicy bois. Serious note: ......... Still fire ants. They do no good for this world.
What is the weirdest scar you have and how did you get it?
Lost a small piece of my right ear. Sister tried cutting my hair. She was 4. I was younger. You know the rest.
If you had to eat one thing from McDonalds, every meal for a week straight, what would you chose?
My main man chicken nuggies.
If you had to spend the rest of your life as a tree what kind of tree would you be?
Giant redwood. Try to cut me down now, fuckers.
If you could bring one fictional character to life, who would it be?
One of my OCs, if they count. If not, then... Fuckin' I dunno. Sweet JP? Fuck yeah, Sweet JP.
On a scale from 1-10 whats the highest level of pain youve ever been in?
This question is completely arbitrary as you will never know what 10 is until you die from shock, but nonetheless, 4. Syringes.
If you inherited a single room off-the-grid cabin in the woods, would you be excited or disappointed?
Excited. Loot and rent out.
What do you think phones will be like in 10 years?
Think? Gone, headsets and eye tracking etc. Want? Flip phones, man. Fuck.
What are two things you would do if you woke up to find yourself completely invisible?
1. Commit crimes. Like, soooo many crimes.
2. Learn the limits of invisibility the hard(time in jail) way.
If you could have one superpower, what would it be and why?
Made in Heaven because FUCK YOU STANDS ARE SUPERPOWERS.