If you were in the circus what kind of performer would you be? (Clown, tight-rope walker, etc)
What song would you sing for your American Idol audition?
For the sake of everyone else in the world, I would never subject anyone to my tone deaf singing.
Have you ever been drunk in public?
I thought that was the whole point of going out to the bars?
What is your guilty pleasure?
If you were about to be executed what five foods would have as your last meal?
Whatever five other people on the row wanted. I'm going to die, can't take that shit with me. Might as well make someone else's day on the way out.
If you were in a witness protection program, what would be your new name and where would you go?
What if I'm already in the program and I'm not allowed to tell you. Huh? Did you ever think of that, you insensitive clod?!?! (Oh shit, I don't think I'm supposed to put things like this into public forums.)
If you could deliver a speech to the entire world, what would you say?
It would start with something along the lines of, "The Christians got it wrong. Everyone has the potential to be Jesus. The appearance of another sage, another savoir is not an indication of the end of times, but verification that we are all moving in the right direction. Now put down your religious books, unplug from your televisions and Internets, and start doing all of that stuff that you instinctively want to do, but society has made you ashamed of."
Would you let me slap you for a hundred dollars?
Would you let me hit you back for $50?
If it were possible, would you live on the moon?
If you had to read an entire encyclopedia, which letter would you choose?
Q, because maybe I could find some words that do not start with Qu for those rare, once in a decade occasions when I play Scrabble.
On a scale from 1-10 whats the highest level of pain youve ever been in?
9, assuming that 10 is where you pass out because your body can't take it anymore.
If you had to choose to live without one of your five senses, which one would you give up?
If you were offered the position of mayor of your city, would you take it?
Hell yes. My city is only ~10,000 people and the last mayor was a power hungry bitch who we ran out of town. I <3 my city.
Do you believe in Bigfoot?
Do you not believe in Bigfoot?
Which Disney princess do you find to be the most attractive?
The one who my current partner wants to cosplay as.
Who is your favorite stand-up comedian? Why?
Me. I crack myself up.
If you could choose your age forever, what age would you choose and why?
I think this really depends on whether or not I get to keep my current level of maturity (shut up, stop laughing at me!), or if I have to regress that back to the point it was at if I pick an earlier age.
If you found out you were the direct descendant of a king or queen, would that boost your self esteem or have no affect on you at all?