Twenty Answers
Describe your perfect sandwich.
Cheddar cheese, wheat bread, grilled to golden perfection.
What is the weirdest scar you have and how did you get it?
Semi-circle along bottom jaw. Face + pavement, had to have a few things reset.
Do you believe in Bigfoot?
Does your mother count?
Would you become a professional bank robber if you knew you would never get caught?
Who's to say I'm not already?
If you could get away with a crime, would you? If yes, what would it be?
Mail fraud.
If you were offered the position of mayor of your city, would you take it?
Fuck no. I don't have time for that.
What board game do you hate the most?
Backgammon.
If you had to spend the rest of your life as a tree what kind of tree would you be?
A bonsai tree. With all the kinky love and devotion of a random old Japanese man to give me care.
What country would you never want to visit?
Latvia. I hate potatoes.
If you inherited a single room off-the-grid cabin in the woods, would you be excited or disappointed?
Happy. Everyone needs a place to hide when things go wrong.
What fashion trend do you wish would come back?
High frilled collars and puffy velvet sleeves.
If you could go on a cross country road trip with famous person, dead or alive, who would it be?
Hunter S. Thompson
Whats your least favorite fast food restaurant?
Sad Clown Burgers LLC
What skills do you posses that could help you survive the zombie apocalypse?
I can crochet. I can craft valuable items with string and a stick. Zombies will be harmless if I crochet enough mittens and fuzzy muzzles for them.
How would you describe yourself in three words?
Twice as nice.
What phobias have you overcome in your lifetime?
Damp dish towels.
What is the strangest thing you've ever eaten?
Pencil erasers.
What would you do if you were the lone survivor of a plane crash?
I loved my friends, but everyone's got to eat something.
If you could deliver a speech to the entire world, what would you say?
Play nice and don't snitch.
Who is your favorite stand-up comedian? Why?
George Carlin
