If you had to spend the rest of your life as a tree what kind of tree would you be?
Ficus macrophylla. Because even though I can't move. I can still fuck shit up.
Whats something you always wanted to do as a child but never got to do it?
Sail away. All the way away.
If you had to eat one thing from McDonalds, every meal for a week straight, what would you chose?
If someone wrote a biography about you, what do you think the title should be?
Whats the dumbest thing youve ever cried about?
Figuring out how to answer this question.
What famous artist, dead or alive, would you want to paint your portrait?
Do you think all dogs go to heaven?
What's a dog?
If you could trade lives with anyone for a day who would it be and why?
The person attached to the eyes reading this. Just to see what happens.
If you were in a witness protection program, what would be your new name and where would you go?
Anonymous. Papua New Guinea
What skills do you posses that could help you survive the zombie apocalypse?
I can find food anywhere.
What is the funniest movie you have ever seen?
Team America: World Police
What country would you never want to visit?
Who is your favorite stand-up comedian? Why?
George Carlin. He was the master. Even if I didn't like his stance on something, the mastery of his performance was inspirational.
If you inherited a single room off-the-grid cabin in the woods, would you be excited or disappointed?
Wait, is this a real thing? Is this actually happening? Am I actually inheriting a cabin in the woods? You're not messing with me are you? Where is it? When can I go there?
If a theme song played every time you entered a room, what would it be?
Entry of the Gladiators by Julius Fucik
Would you become a professional bank robber if you knew you would never get caught?
Wouldn't that be more like just making a large withdrawal once a month? Walk in casually, "I'll have all the monies please." Casually walk out.
Sure. I mean...OK
If you could start a collection of one kind of item, what would it be?
If you could go back in time and change history, what would you change?
I can't predict the outcome of my actions. What point is there in trying to change the past?
If you inherited or won a million dollars, whats the very first thing you would do with the money?
Buy that boat and sail away. All the way away.
What scene from a non-horror movie scared you as a child?
I've blocked it out.