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Hockey? Puck?

One hour of horn honking, interrupted sleep.
Now I must go work.

If you are a sports nut:
Screaming your lungs out at 2am on a Saturday night after a 3-0 win? Understandable, amusing, expected. The city went nuts. Our loan police helicopter felt loved and appreciated and put to good use since the City tends to bring it out to bust down small house parties.

Screaming your lungs out at 5am on a Sunday morning as you and your buddies� smash bottles in an intersection?  You've just given the go ahead to be hunted down and then garrotted with your own freshly purchased Flames jersey and child labour produced plastic air horn.

*mutters*

Having spent a good half hour watching a severely intoxicated gentleman wield a hockey stick and proceed to beat the shit out of his own bike is well worth this bleary eyed morning.


Uhhhhh…..

...What?

Make sense, woman!

Stupid Californian, HOCKEY!!

Gods…

*mutters about americans and hockey*

Calgary Flames - Stanley Cup Playoffs - won game 3-0 at home - now up in series 2-1.

Bias = In Calgary.

IN Calgary = Noisey when win happens.


(I hear there were 40,000 people on 17th last game night, and then 15,000 marched from the dome to 17th after the win.)

Ohhhh… sports. Ok, we can talk about sports.

Special thanks to Patri Friedman for capturing my views in a rant, which will now follow:

Recently, I heard an ad on the radio whose basic plot was as follows:

The narrator is a lawyer, but he doesn't seem to be getting ahead in the firm. For one thing, everyone else is always talking about sports, a subject he knows little about. They are always discussing teams, games, who will win this week, that sort of thing. His passion is Flamenco dancing, which just doesn't seem to ever get brought up. Then, he starts reading so-and-so's sports column in such-and-such a magazine. It tells him what opinions to have, and he quotes the column during the water cooler bull sessions, resulting in enthusiastic high-fives among his co-workers. A few months later, he makes partner, and finally has the courage to dance his Flamenco at the next company party.

The ad is horrible in general, telling us that we have to conform in order to get ahead, and that eccentricity is only tolerated after success. While this may be an unfortunate truth about the lame-ass culture in which we live, it still deserves criticism. The particular sort of conforming, namely our culture's obsession with sports, requires some explanation as to why it is a bad thing. First, let me frankly admit that there are a lot of different reasons why people like sports, and many of these are good. Still, I believe that the particular negative that I focus on is a strong part of the psychology, and I haven't heard it discussed before.

Lets cover some of the good reasons first. It is fun to watch people who are good at doing things, especially physical activities. There is a certain grace inherent in extreme levels of athletic ability, and it is beautiful. Athletes also stretch the limits of human ability, and as humans, we are naturally interested in seeing what is possible for members of our race to accomplish. The ability of humans to find patterns in data and to predict the future based on the past is an important one, and sports teams are a complicated and interesting place to exercise this ability. Since it is such a common forum for this, people can compare their methods with those of friends and professionals, evaluate people based on their ability, and even make a living betting, if they are good enough. Still, it should be noted that there are other places to explore prediction that are actually relevant to the world, like the stock market.

Sometimes, sports teams are allied with regions, countries, or institutions, and the people watching are members of those areas. Often, the connection is meaningless - professional athletes usually have little to do with the cities for which they play. Occasionally, however, the success or failure of a team actually indicates something about its affiliated entity. When two countries compete in the Olympics, for example, not only is the ability of those countries to find and train athletes being tested, but, for countries that are genetically homogenous (unlike the United States), the athletic prowess of their race is being measured. The results have a very real meaning to other members of that race. In high schools, the members of the team are often personal friends of their fans, and so it is natural for those fans to care about the success or failure of the team.

The particular area of misplaced enthusiasm which I am focusing on, however is the American love for professional sports (the worldwide obsession with football is probably similar, but I am not as familiar with it). These things are, I believe, mostly not motivated by the above reasons. Instead, I think there are some much worse ones. First, an axiom. Who wins these sporting contests is irrelevant. It does not matter, except inasmuch as people choose to make it matter. It does not make the world a better or worse place. This is important, and if you don't accept it the rest of this ain't gonna work, so give some serious thought to it.

The first problem is that when people care about sports teams, they are attaching their happiness to arbitrary phenomena beyond their control. They have basically nothing to do with whether "their team" wins or loses. They are getting on an emotional roller coaster and letting someone else steer. This is not always bad - experiencing emotional swings that don't actually matter can be useful. In movies, for example, we enjoy having our emotions manipulated in an artificial context. It is fun to "practice" emotions that we do not often experience in life, without the danger of it making us unhappy for very long.

Movies, however, last for a short, well-defined period. When they are over, we go back to our real lives and our real emotions. The boundaries of sports are much fuzzier. Games occur frequently, and thus the associated emotions are a constant part of the fan's life. This gets them used to caring about things they cannot change, which I think is a bad thing. We have the power to affect our lives and the world around us, and ignoring that generally makes the world a worse place. Learning to care a lot about things that do not matter and you cannot affect is bad, especially when there are so many things that matter and you can affect to care about. When our favorite team loses, we get to bitch, moan, and complain to others, but there isn't actually anything we can do about it. This cannot but create a feeling of helplessness. And on the other side of the coin, since we can't do anything about it, we aren't expected to do anything. There is no pressure, no responsibility, no possible criticism for our actions. Sweet, huh? What a fucking cop-out.

Much of the lure of sports lies in the illusion that they are important. It is pretty clear, when you think about it, that they aren't, but the illusion is strong. After all, an awful lot of people care about them. Our newspapers in the morning and news shows at night have a business segment, a political segment, and a sports segment, implying that these sectors are of equal value. There are magazines devoted to sports. People can gather with tens of thousands of others in order to cheer for a sports team. Random strangers will discuss sports with you. Athletes are paid vast salaries, given roles in movies, and get to pitch products in advertisements - the ultimate sign of success in our society of commercialism. It is no wonder that so many are fooled into taking them with far more seriousness than they deserve.

Many people feel that they don't have important things to care about. People like to feel important, and they like to talk about things that matter. Unfortunately, talking about things that matter tends to bring up a lot of thorny, difficult questions and issues. Often the answers are unpleasant, and people don't like things that are unpleasant. Thus the subject of sports acts as an empty, meaningless alternative to the real issues that exist in the world. A distraction, a fluttering cape, an opiate to keep the masses down. So next sunday, instead of sitting in front of the tube while your brain slowly melts, try concentrating on something that will affect your life. Take the jog in the park you always wimp out on, do some work on the house, volunteer to help the less fortunate, even just sit around and read a book that will teach you something (lazy, restful ways of affecting your life are few, but they do exist). I, and the world, and most importantly, your life, will thank you for it.

Kev, I didn't realize you were a Marxist. Opiate of the masses indeed. Right up there with religion.

:)

You are boiling sports down to a binary, which is to be expected from a coder. They are far more complex than what you have stated. I personally hate them for the most part. I don't play team sports, I rarely watch them (when compaired to the people around me at least.) I do enjoy the athleticism of certain sports like basketball, and to a much lesser extent Hockey.

I also enjoy the community energy that 'teams' can bring to a community, especially in a place like Calgary where a 'winning' team adds a huge bonus to the economy.

Also, there is a Canadian obsession with Hockey. It is a sport that we made, a sport that we are very skilled at, and have an environment that is conductive to playing/participating in it. (ie: 6-8 months of winter and ice.) Thousands upon thousands of Canadian kids play hockey and ringette. It brings people together as a community.

But, I do follow what you are saying. There are potentially negative social side effects. But, the same can be said for the examples you laid out.

And…in conclusion:

dude: It's hockey! Like, come on man!

If you have money you're excentric, if you don't you're crazy.

I think that's why people call me crazy in a dayly basis.

Sir Kevlar
[CanadianTeamInPlayoffs]*[LongTimeComing]=FansCrawlingOutOfWoodwork]
([Fans]+[AssholeFactor])*[rabidity]=[ScratchedupWoodwork]

[Me]=[Tired].

There was a bit of a paragraph on bicycle battery but who needs that sort of imagery.
Puck is a mischievous fairy and once again it seems that my post isn�t making a lick of structured logical sense. I do apologise.

Iga. Believe the number you mentioned. It looked and felt like that much people. There is no sleeping for anyone within a 5 block radius of 17th during win nights so you might as well go down and party. As for tonight. I�m strongly debating about sleeping up in the burbs. I�m out in the mountains for wed evening so that will be just peachy. But then again, if there's a riot, I'll regret not being there with a camera.

Call it eccentricity but I don�t enjoy riots, even when they are good for business, as pointed out by the nice owner of a Jamaican caf� on 17th av. Now, because we�re Calgarians, maybe our riots will focus more on self-abuse and people doing smart things like destroying their own property and fighting with the drug dealers on the street corner.  I'm still amazed at the cries of "get off our fucking street!" that keep getting hurled at the local dealers since the playoofs started. From what I know of the area, this didn't happen before, the local residents simply circulate a petition and gave it to city hall and waited, and made lots of phone calls, and waited.

While I love the energy the playoffs have caused in such a notoriously subdued and conservative city I hope this energy of a win will transfer onto other things. Because bloody hell, as Iga puts it (while I'm slowly typing up my post), "dude: It's hockey! Like, come on man! "

And Sir Patri Friedman is on the money. In any social situation, it�s not what you know; it�s what the people around you know and how best you can talk about it.

Damn, I'm hooped.

(Edited by Bias at 1:43 pm on May 31, 2004)

mmmm…riots...been a while since Calgary had one of them.
everyone talks about the wrongs in our country, the bad things our government/president do.  

well what about perpetutating a society where you can be a multi-millionare for tossing a stupid orange rubber ball through a round metal hoop, but the teachers, police, soldiers, and fireman (along with a host of other important jobs.)  are snuffed…  think about it, I mean really think about it, the people responsible for keeping your neighborhood/country safe, or raising future generations many of those people live paycheck to paycheck while shaq(who's arguabily not even that skilled) is paying someone to count how many bottles of krystal are in his fridge.


hockey is cool though.

You can argue that athletes at least have some skill to show off… I just watched ten minutes of "Newlyweds: Jessica and Nick" and I'm all for the goddamed revolution.

*readys pitchfork but tries not to start any fires for the firemen to have to put out...*

any show that involves rich people complaining that much could drive me to murder.

oh no I'm a millonare and I have to do laundry, omygod my life is so hard….

don't even get me started

You will be able to stay at home, brother. You will be able to tune in, drink up, and bloat out. You will be able to smoke pot and eat shrooms, then skip out for a few beers. Because the revolution WILL be televised, whether you like it or not…it will be super-sized, right-sized, and SUV-sized. The revolution will be televised. The revolution will promise to make you better looking, it will get you a nice car. The revolution will make you cool by obeying your thirst. There will be hot chicks and sexy men for everyone, the revolution will provide for all your wants and needs. The revolution will put human and pig genetics in your vegetables. The revolution will shout MORE! MORE! MORE! The revolution will be televised. The revolution will be run by big rich white men who hire poor good looking black men to sell you. The revolution will make you wish you had sex appeal. The revolution will be syndicated and run in replay across the globe for all time. The revolution will give you wealth, power, and prestige. The revolution WILL be televised. It will add or subtract from your bank account. It will shoot up your children with hard drugs. The revolution will make you desperate and lonely, and make you wish to kill yourself. The revolution WILL be televised. The revolution will be sold to you in easy to pay installments of eight dollars and thirty-two cents. It will be on NBC, ABC, TNT, and CNN. The revolution will be televised. It will take away all your choices by providing you a plethora of things to pick from. It will give you more hair. More fat. More sexual prowess. The revolution will not be lead by angry citizens bent on fixing the world, there will be no Willie Nelson's, no Bob Dylans, and no Hip-Hop Heros. The revolution WILL be right back after these messages, WILL be fed to children in cartoons and cereal. You WILL have to worry about your abilities in the bedroom, putting fuel in your tank, and paying that electric bill. The revolution WILL go better with Coke. The revolution WILL fight germs that cause bad breath. The revolution WILL make you feel like you are in the drivers seat.

The revolution WILL be televised.

Well, that's all nice and well Iga, but where do I fit in?
Lightning win! Muahahaha.

But no, really, i didnt care for either of the teams. So naturally i think its fair to root for the home team in a game 7.

*shrugs*

2 years without cable of any kind, and most of that with just Fox coming in. weird stuff to watch now…

*mutters*

As if the people of Tampa Bay really care about hockey.

Damn expansion teams with large budgets. Though I must say, Tampa out played Calgary big time. Ah well, tis next year.

I ended up catching half the game on a wide screen projector in a goth/industrial bar. It was great. The bar itself is located a few blocks too far from the party strip for most revellers so there were about 12 people inside. That = great seats on comfy couches.
Then my friend and I got bored and we wandered off to catch Harry Potter. :P We felt sacrilegious. But we couldn't escape it. Ended up seeing the sad sad, struggling end.
Poor flames. All their movements looked flat out exhausted. The downtown core was full of half hearted honking when they lost and then everyone shuffled home. I did enjoy watching some guys attempt to knock over a dumpster. They quickly gave up after it proved more effort at rioting then they felt it was worth.

Couldn't help thinking that sums up Albertans somehow… :P At least it wasn�t 0-2.

Calgary has a goth bar?
Sort of. It's called Machine. Maybe not full gothishy, this is calgary afterall… but it does a good job at pretending. It's the closest thing that I've managed to find other then The Warehouse. Wed are decent. Industrial, electro, IDM... Ja.

There's always punk rock tuesdays. heh.

(Edited by Bias at 12:30 pm on June 8, 2004)