–Damon
No biggie, I haven't had any motivation to do anything at all on the MOO for several months anyhow. Funny how a hobby can get so bogged down in political bullshit.
I -may- be joining Damon and Nixxi (also departed) on a MOO project, depends how things pan out.
Viva.
I -was- Sindomian.
Nixxi, if you remember anything from Sindome remember this "BUBBLES IN THE POOP!"
Rastus, Keep ranting please, they always make me smile.
Damon, If you have time when you got some leave, give me a buzz we'll hook up for Dave & Busters or something. aim == xsamri
My last words for all of you, This sucks!
Viva Sindome
Viva Fifth Dimension
Viva Rastus
Viva Nixxi
Viva me, mother fuckers.
--Damon
Sindome was my way out, if I'd had a bad day I'd log in, vent a little then things would be fine because I could play someone else for a few hours. Thanks for being my free shrink, SD.
I met some very close friends with sindome... Some I'll hold very dear, forever.
I like to think I worked my way up to being an admin there, but who knows... I certainly didn't give anyone head to do it. *grins* Over the past little while though, sindome felt more like a [Job] rather then a place where I kicked back and had fun. I've had a taste of Roleplaying and MOO's and the tight circle of people who play them… I can't help but feel slightly hurt that I spent alot of my waking hours connected to the game and then I find out over a phonecall at work (I had initally called to see of Rastus wanted McDonalds) that I've been denied my bit and thrown off the MOO.
Such is life though, right? I hope the ones who replace Damon, Rastus and myself do us justice add flavor to the game and keep it real.
Yeah, I admit, I have a bad temper but so do most of us... I admit I could have been nicer, more patient, but mistakes are just that... Mistakes.
Maybe if I hadn't felt shoved out of place by someone who hasn't dedicated the -time- and -energy- to the MOO I wouldn't be where I am now. Maybe if I was allowed to have an opinion more often... Maybe if...
The things I'll miss most is having something to work for other than the RL things that sometimes hit hard. I'll miss being part of something... Just that. Something.
I'll find another place, it won't be sindome, but it will do.
Good Luck Sindome, you've marked a place in my heart.
Nixxi/ Eclipse
Damon, Rastus and Nixxi left on their own. I never asked or told them to leave.
Damon, I suggested he leave since we had too many differences.
Rastus choose to leave and his post made it clear that Nixxi was going with him.
All 3 of been invaluable additions to the dome and will always be considered family to the game.
- J
I think, before you are gone-gone, provided you aren't already gone-gone, that you should at least go out with a bang and not -just- a forum thread, hm?
What
The
FUCK!
You guys, you know me.
AOL: Grimakus
Hotmail/Windows Messenger: [email protected]
Yahoo! Messenger: Doc_Miracle
ICQ: Grim Destiny
Chat with me sometime, okay? Please???
And now, my words of parting to you three:
Well met, fellow travellers. May our paths cross somewhere down the road, if not in this place. In brightest day, in blackest night, blessings, love, and light.
*bows humbly to those who walked the path before him*
We (The Players) did nothing nothing to you. Did we? I know -I- personally didn't do anything. Yet when you attack the MOO you are attacking me down the line. I realize that you have a problem with Johnny and taking it out on SD is the logical action, but remember, Johnny isn't the only person that uses the MOO, there are the rest of us that don't have an Admin side, that aren't involved except for the RP side of everything. And I don't think that it's fair to me or the rest of the players.
The rest of the community wished all of you well, under what ever circumstances you left. It's been that way since I got here. Admin leaves, the community supports that. It'll be that way forever (I hope).
There are other courses of action that you can take aside from being a dick to the rest of us. So I ask you to please remember us over here, because we remember -all- of you, in good spirits. And I like it that way!
So please, remember, when you hurt the MOO you hurt the ones that hurted you, and you hurt the ones that don't even know what's going on.
Rigby/Sath/Dave -out.
Quote: from Johnny on 10:33 pm on Mar. 20, 2002[br]Just so things are understood correctly …Damon, Rastus and Nixxi left on their own. I never asked or told them to leave.
Damon, I suggested he leave since we had too many differences.
Rastus choose to leave and his post made it clear that Nixxi was going with him.
All 3 of been invaluable additions to the dome and will always be considered family to the game.
- J
What the fuck? Yeah, just so things are understood correctly lets make sure they are. Damon, Nixxi and myself left in three totally seperate incidents that were in now way related. Not ONE of use left in protest at the departure of the other two and NOT ONE of us left 'with' any of the others.
I had no beef with Johnny until I read that, now…
Fuck you and FUCK JohnnyMOO.
I know that I pissed you all off alot, I think I hold the "most celled" record with you guys, interaction with Nixxi and Damon was minimal, I had a few good conversations with Rastus while he was watching his neutered cats mount eachother, I wish you all the best of luck in any endeavor you partake in, and Rastus, hope our MOO kicks some ass like Sindome.
Well, I also hope you all contact me via AIM
aim == kevin80003
Firstly, to the departing admins I wish you well. Though I was only introduced to Sindome last autumn I have enjoyed my experience with it and with those of you whom I interacted with, even if I knew it or not.
Your work here has been welcomed and I've yet to hear a bad word about your dedicated or commitment to the MOO.
Secondly, I say this and I won't use names but you know who you are… if upon occassion someone feels like ranting or letting off some steam that is what this BBS is about, venting so that it is not done in the game. I have never once taken offense to anything said on here, even if it was a rant that put down players or the game. And I have not been offended because I remember the most important thing - IT IS A GAME. This isn't real. It doesn't and shouldn't effect how you feel about yourself or your self-esteem. It shouldn't effect how you feel about other people. Yes, you may disagree with them, and yes it might annoy you, but let it go. Not everything is about you. Sometimes, and most often, it is about the person posting it. Stop thinking that the world, this BBS, and the moo revolves around you. Grow up.
And if anyone takes offense to that I say it again, IT IS A GAME and GROW UP!
Yep, it's just a game... sure.
You try telling that to any of the admin currently nursing their wounds where-ever they've currently settled. Yup, maybe it is just a game to you, but you're 'just a player'. Excuse if that sounds patronizing, it's not meant to, but it's a simple fact. You connect, you play, you quit. You don't spend hours pouring over code and concepts, building the game as a labor of love for no reward save for the satisfaction of the challenge. If -ANY- of the admin though of it as 'just a game' it probably wouldn't be here now, and if it were it'd be a pale shadow of itself.
Feh, I'd explain the situation but Johnny would just delete the post as he's been doing all night.
You have something you've devoted alot of your time to creating, building and/or nurturing, Tash? Got children? They're "just animals", no big deal if you lose them, just make more. Got a worthwhile career? It's "just a job", no-one gives a shit about your contribution anyhow, you're easily replaced. Got life? It's "just one in billions", no-one's gonna care once you're dead.
Fuck you and your "just a game".
Assuming that was directed at me…
Actually it wasn't directed at you. Or any of the admins.
Yup, maybe it is just a game to you, but you're 'just a player'. Excuse if that sounds patronizing, it's not meant to, but it's a simple fact. You connect, you play, you quit. You don't spend hours pouring over code and concepts, building the game as a labor of love for no reward save for the satisfaction of the challenge. If -ANY- of the admin though of it as 'just a game' it probably wouldn't be here now, and if it were it'd be a pale shadow of itself.
What Rastus wrote was in fact part of what I was trying to say. I was trying to say that as players we shouldn't take the occasional rant posted by an admin on the BBS personally. The admin put a great deal of effort into working on the moo, and though they might enjoy it, they still -work- at it, we just play on it. We enjoy the fruits of their labour and for some reason some of us, again I mean players, seem to think that gives us the right to bitch and moan and whine and cry about how the things people post on here (especially if those people are admins) hurt our feelings or are unfair. We, and again I mean the players, well some of us, forget that for us it should be just a game.
I have run online games before, but nothing to this capacity, and having found what I did stressful I can only imagine how stressful it must be to be an admin here, and if that means for their mental health they've got to vent then I think most of us would be happy to shut up and just let them. After all, if anyone deserves to complain it is the people who actually work at making Sindome a better place.
And now I'm going to shut up. I apologise to Damon, Nixxi and Rastus for distracting people from what the original intent of this topic was: to say goodbye to three excellent administrators who have made Sindome a pleasant place to while away the hours.
Damon – I don't know a damn thing about what you did as an admin. What I will always remember about you was your great talent for RPing an absolute nut when I first started playing. When Devon "died" the Dome lost an awesome villan, and fantastic RP.
Rastus! -- The one admin (besides Stonemonk) who talked to me like I was a friend, and helped me whenever I needed it, even if I needed help that had nothing to do with the game. You were awesome to talk to, and I hope we can still have conversations over AIM. You're awesome.. Even if you're a pervert. :)
Nixxi -- I didn't talk to you much OOC. I RPed with you several times and didn't even know it, though. And you were a lot of fun... And your random wierd OOC shouts always made me laugh.
I'm sorry to see all of you go. I've been here a year, and I wish I'd been here longer to get to know the three of you. You're cool people. I wish all of you the best, and I thank you for helping make the game that has become my daily temporary escape that much better. I've seen in the past year all of the work that has been put into this, the new code that has made the game more realistic, and I don't know if any of the other players give it any thought, but I frequently look at this game and say, "Well damn.. I couldn't do that..". So, more than a goodbye to Damon, Rastus and Nixxi, but also a big thank you to all of the admin, past and present.
Ok. Dorky's done now.
Carrie/Des
I too, even being here a short time, am already on the brink of leaving. In fact, it has occured many times in the past. To me, this game is changing. I will be the first to admit I've fucked up a few times as I grew acustumed to the admin-side of things. I got hell from both player and admin. And to all those who feel attacked by myself, or who dislike me in any way, I applogize. Yes. I have screwd up. Yes. This game does take a ton of time to run. No. I do not want to leave in the least.
Unfortunatly, its started to seem that I am almost being pushed away. I'm the new guy on the block, like Grim, my opinion really means shit. I've gotten cussed out, booted, yelled at, blamed, and all around slandered for stuff I did and stuff I didn't do. Granted, some of that I deserved… but there were times when it was just overwhelming. Now, whether it came from admin or player it doesn't matter. To me, they are one and the same. Parts of a single machine. Alone, the parts don't do shit. But when they fit together, there is smooth loco-motion.
The pistons haven't been firing lately.
I don't want to go into too much detail over why I am very very close to joining three of the best friends I have, Damon, Nix, Ras... I will tell you that lack of appreciating is not part of it. (That was posted somewhere...)
I, for the time being, will most likely stay, unless something else comes up. Sindome has already taken a massive blow with the loss of the other three. And although my parting wouldn't mean too much, it would be one less admin around.
Only time to tell.
Nix, Ras, Damon. I salute you all. I wish you were still on the team with us. But your decisions seem to be set. I want to appologize to the three of you, and to everyone else, for any crap I may have given you. Know that you will be missed, and that I intend to keep up with you.
Peace out everyone.
I stand by what I said in it's own context, but humbly retract any implied anger at your post. Actually, I wish I could have posted this before you replied because having thought about it at work today I was more than convinced I'd made the wrong assumption, but usually when people talk about someone ranting and being abusive on these forums without mentioning any names they're -usually- refering to me.
And thanks to -everyone- who's been messaging me, emailing me and generally saying hello. Please, if you want to say hello, do so. Don't wait for me to message you because frankly I've so many strange names on my ICQ and AIM that most of the time I've got no clue who I'm talking to from the MOO.
While yes you guys don't know what it's like on the admin side of things, imagine going to the sweetest adult ( i don't mean x rated 'adult') playground and hangin' with a group of people every day for 2 years. Leats that's me. If you can picture that, then you know what it's like on our side.
Someone tries to taint your clubhouse, you get pissed.
Someone wants to join and contributes, you get excited.
Someone leaves and might not come back, you get sad.
Not all admin view SD as their clubhouse. Some might see it as a resume builder or whatever, I duno. But as odd as it sounds, Rastus especially, was someone I hung out with everyday for the last two years and got to know on a somewhat personal level. As personal as an athiest and a Christian can be. (that's a joke). As many of you know there are ranks in admin. That's how you keep organized, it's good. And even though Rastus was quite a few steps higher than I was, he treated me as an equal and I enjoyed Plotting with him.
As for Damon, He was a lot of my first experience on the MOO, from his alt to plottery, to Gally's GRS bag. (ooh ooh, big surprise) As a player I was happy to have them around. Nixxi also here and elsewhere was a pleasure to MOO with and dammit I still have a keychain to send her.
I don't mean any disrespect to other admin, but I am partial to Rastus. Some people you just connect with more than others. But I've lost a lot of hope for SD with him gone. While yes you can find other coders, other tools, but Rastus' has a creative brain the likes of which i've not often seen. Yes we've got a lot of talent here at SD, and a lot of it just left. I still think that at this moment SD is the greatest M** I've seen, but my personal feelings are muddled as to it's future. That's just me losing hope. Perhaps that makes me weak.
I just hope people would have as kind of words to say to me if I ever leave....
As for that. Don't worry about it. *shrugs* Who knows what'll happen in the next weeks, months years. I could be here til tomorrow, or until I grow up. We never know so don't worry about the rest of us admin. You all just keep playing. We devote our time because we enjoy it and because we like seeing our playground utilized.
Yes this is a hobby, it's a game. A painting is a painting, a play is a play, a story is a story. And yet somehow some stick out more than others, some break off a piece of themselves and lodge it into our chests. I cry at the end of good movies, I am empowered by heroic books. Perhaps I'm easily moved or simple minded, but SD does this for me and Rastus, Damon and Nixxi, from day one of my arrival here have shaped my story here. And that means something.
Right, i'm mostly writing this for myself and the three, so sorry if it's long, cheesy and spammy.
I'd suggest a day of not logging in in rememberence, but that might be over the top :P
-The Monk of Stone.
Jay/Molochai/AIM lycan82
I first logged on to the dome geesh 2 2 and half years ago, back in the XM days, I've seen lots of change, players come and go, but nothing like what I'm experiancing now. I remember last summer at 2 am talkin to Ras about life over xhelp, and chatting with him like an old pal, and while I enjoyed Damon's constant ummm Troublemaking...and the stuff that Nixxi did...umm yeah I felt like I almost gained a friend with ras (ask him he don't feel that way heh) But I remember hearing everything he tried to code, while fixing, GMing working and other stuff, and I was in just awe of how well and how much this man could do.
Well my ramblings are tied together in this point...with the departure of Damon I wasn't shocked and in fact had wondered more of when it would happen as opposed to if. When ras left I was shocked, it seemed like he'd been fine days before and poof he's gone...and now Nixxi...I'm wondering -exactly- what's going up three in adminland, I start to wonder if there is a little admin politict war and what not going on....I can always remember some tension between people....FS and bishop code, Johnny and Damon's antics...but I never thought it would come to 3 very active and important admin leaving the dome
I understand there are things that are out of others control, some where bound to happen, others were not. And utnil I know exactly what was going on I can not make any assumptions as to what might happen (forgive me if this doens't make sense I'm tired). But I do know, things were a lot better RP wise 8 months ago, and I enjoyed it a lot more....with these recent occurances I too, have pondered leaving...for some reasons these recent problems have raised concern as to the Dome's importance...Your not gonna find a clown like damon, not even -I'm- that close, you won't find a such and enjoyable GM like Nixxi easily....and I can garuntee you Rastus will not be replace by one man alone, and will not be replaced easily....he was a workhorse, a fuckin hoss and you will be missed all of you.
Somehow I feel I should have posted this two days ago, when I was angry, things were so much clearer then. Not that things aren't clear now, but the passion with which I wanted to post them has faded. Maybe it'll come to me as I type, that's what usually happens with my 'rants'…
What the fuck happened? That's what everyone keeps asking me and I've taken the time to tell the tale to a few people, but frankly it was getting pretty tiring going through it for 20 minutes with each of you, so I just got to telling y'all I'd make a post... So, amongst other things, here I'll include my perspective on the events leading up to Nixxi and Damon leaving along with my personal reasons for leaving.
I have alot to say in this post and I really don't know what order to say it in, so I'll just go with my usual rant style and let it come out however it comes out. It won't be award winning literature, but it'll do the job.
And so, where to start?
I guess I'll start with Damon, since he was the first to go, though it won't necessarily be chronological with other events I have to recount.
What to say about Damon? I respect the guy and I have a healthy dislike of him. That's being honest. I'm pretty sure he's aware of it and it's why I'll be declining his offer of a wizbit on his new MOO project, more of which later. Anyone who's been here longer than a year or who reads the forums thoroughly will be aware of Damon's 'adventures'. They're not the point of this, but the reference needs to be made to explain what from here on will be refered to as "Damon's reputation". Wether it's true or not, Damon earned a reputation as a "hacker". The term can be argued for ever and a day, but the fact remains Damon has been accused of various "attacks" against other M*. That should be all I need to say about that for now...
In addition, Damon has... a flare for dispute. Honestly? I hate arguing with him. I can argue with the best of them, but argue with Damon, assuming he has the grunt to back it up (as in being a wiz/justice) and he'll not lose. He'll make you feel like shit. I don't really know how to explain it, all I know is that aswell as myself, Johnny and FireStorm avoided any disagreement with him, it just wasn't worth the trouble. Stubborn? I dunno. I don't want to paint a bad picture of him, as a coder I have the utmost respect for him, as a person I have nothing against him.
When Damon did things that effected the MOO, via his IC alt or via his "attacks" on other M*, the issue was always raised about "punishing" him. Newting, toading, demoting, whatever. In the end the same result was always reached, no-one wanted to do it because of his "reputation". We were -scared- to deal with him.
Things were reletively peaceful during his recent time away but when he returned the usual arguments commenced. I'm not going to comment to far on them because I stayed uninvolved. Largely he argued with Johnny, sometimes Damon was right, sometimes Johnny was right, sometimes they argued in circles refusing to acknowledge they were saying the same thing because both were too stubborn to simply accept they'd misunderstood the way the other was explaining it and accept what they were arguing against.
Maybe a week ago Johnny called me to get what I guess would amount to my "vote" for removing Damon from the MOO. They were arguing at the time. I reluctantly agreed to removing him, leaving Johnny just to contact FS and get his agreement. Somewhere between calling me and calling FS, Damon apologised to Johnny and the matter was withdrawn. To say I was stunned at the idea of Damon apologising would be an understatement. I think Johnny was too. Either way, peace returned and maybe Damon had turned over a new leaf.
Of course, good things don't last and it was only a few days before they were at logger heads again. I don't know what the argument was about, I was there, I simply wasn't paying that much attention and was just keeping my head down but it ended with Johnny stating something along the lines of it was his MOO and if Damon didn't like it he should leave and start his own. Damon simply said, "K then" and logged off.
I woke up the next morning and scanned the backlog as I usually do to find Damon had connected to the MOO 57 times in less than an hour. I checked his code log and found simply repeated entries to a verb that he had editted multiple times, filling his entire code log and that had been deleted after he'd finished. I grepped, I searched, I checked everything I could think of and found nothing untoward, nevertheless, Damons "reputation" was at the front of my mind. Right at that moment it was my firm belief that Damon was doing what we had always feared he would do if he were forced off the MOO. I emailed Johnny and continued searching for anything "odd" in the MOO, I may have been a wizzen but I always considered myself that little bit junior to Johnny, FS and Damon so any idea of making the decision to remove Damon's access wasn't even an option to me. As it happens the first person to connect was Damon. He didn't connect -as- Damon, but he connected his player alt and I decided to call his bluff by asking what he'd been up to all night. He stated he had been porting his code off the MOO and it all fell into place... so, I emailed Johnny again with the explaination and informed Damon that a decision had been made, at the previous incident, that he would be given a full copy of the Sindome DB as a "payoff" to hopefully give him no reason to attack the MOO.
Johnny logged on some time later and changed Damon's password, preventing him from logging on and that was the end of Damon...
I recall Damon stating somewhat bitterly in these forums that he was coerced into leaving. I also recall Johnny stating that Damon chose to leave. I agree more with Damon, he was manouvered into position and pushed. Yes, I -had- agreed that Damon was a problem and needed to be dealt with, but the way it was done made me sick.
Above all else I'd like to make it clear that the one thing that made it a very hard decision for me was knowing how I would (and now do) feel in Damon's shoes. It's a nasty business and a whole lot of bad juju to remove a senior member of a team like the Sindome admin, it was always a close knit team, or so I felt at the time and it simply didn't sit right.
Nevertheless, one thing I feel needs to be stated clearly and will not hide. I was involved in the decision to remove Damon. Cut away all my doubts and problems with the matter, simply put, I opened the door.
I'm sure Damon and Johnny would post two very different stories from their perspectives, I dunno, but that's the story from my perspective for those of you who keep asking.
I think I'll break this post at this point and start typing in a new window...
Damon got his copy of the Sindome DB, minus all the player accounts and such, set up his own "splinterdome", an exact copy of the dome as it stood on the day his bitdom officially came to an end.
Now we skip back a little bit... well, a few years actually, to the time myself and Nixxi (my RL wife) first connected to the MOO. Since -waaaay- back then, Damon and Nixxi got on well. They were good friends and they did all the same chatting you probably do with your net friends, you've never actually met them but nevertheless, you're good friends.
Needless to say, Damon and Nixxi talked alot around the events of Damon's departure and it was more than obvious that she would become an admin on his MOO. This was just hours after Damon had departed and there was still some communication going back and forth between him and Johnny regarding things he wasn't allowed to do with the db and fixing problems Damon was having due to certain parts of his copy that had been disabled for "security". At some point in this Nixxi cut a message from the admin channel on Damon's MOO and pasted it to the admin channel on the real Sindome. I forget the exact words that were said, I was connected from work at the time, but Johnny said something along the lines of how Nixxi shouldn't be on Damon's MOO. It frustrates me that I can't remember the exact words but I -cringed- when I saw them because I knew Nixxi's response was going to be ballistic and frankly it was justified. The implication was that she had no right to be there because Johnny did not approve. She flipped, he went on to tell her it was a conflict of interests, she told him where to stick his conflict of interests and departed.
I shrugged, I xshrugged (admin channel emote) and went about my business. (I was at work at the time so didn't have to face Nixxi about it or deal with the rage first hand).
So yeah, that was the short one... I ask you to note this section carefully. This is why Johnny earlier post stating "Rastus chose to leave and Nixxi chose to leave with him" enraged me so much. It was a -blatant- inaccuracy and ties in with one of the main reasons I'm no longer with Sindome, which I will explain in my next post.
Now the biggie, a story of baggage, trust, respect, abuse, ego's and JohnnyMOO.
Maybe an hour or two later, Nixxi's exit was basically forgotten, wouldn't be the first time an admin had left in a huff only to return a day or two later. Hell, -most- if not ALL of the admin have logged off in anger at some point or other, or at the very least "xidled" signifying they were done with the argument at hand and had the last word. That sits with just how Damon was manouvered off the MOO. Ever had an argument and ended up shouting "If you don't like it, leave"? Get someone wound up far enough into an argument and thats your loaded gun to make them make a mistake and come crawling back to you later with a meek apology. BOOM. Works every time if you know how to pull it off. Married couples will probably understand that one better. �
Anyhow, again we need some background. In this case, my good friend Kevlar, AKA Gunnar. Kick me for revealing alt identity, but in this case it's needed. This is going to be the kicker post where, as I stated elsewhere, some of you are going to decide I'm an asshole. If you don't want to read some loaded IC information, close this window now.
A couple of months ago Johnny logged on to inform us that the messiah was coming. The man who was "going to change Sindome forever". A friend of his from work who apparently was the mother of all coders and played M*. All well and good. Then we get Johnny's rampant excitement one day when he logs on to tell us how he and Gunnar had spent the day talking about how Gunnar was going to recode the skill and stat checking system. This one pissed me off. Since the day I started coding on Sindome I've moaned and bitched at the flaws in the stat/skill system only to be torn apart and told to keep my meddling fingers off because it worked fine and it was none of my business. Being told not to do it was no biggie. The -way- I was told not to do it was somewhat rude, but hey, that's Johnny. Then to be told this new guy was going to recode what I was completely barred from touching… that got my goat.
But hey, I'm a grown man, I can live with bullshit. I mean christ, I stayed with Sindome for over 2 years didn't I?
Next comes Gunnar, the player, because he wants to get a feel for the game before he becomes admin. That's good, that's a real good sign, that's something we've -always- demanded of new admin. You simply can't help to -run- the game if you haven't experienced it.
Then comes the incidents. Please note, these are all minor incidents, but they contribute to the whole. I'm going to tell these because they're relevant to the story despite not being the reason I left.
The pickpocket incident: Gunnar has a run in with some NPC gangers at the Drome where he's been given a job. (A job in his first week of play? How many of you got that?) One of the gangers pickpockets Gunnar and he files a complaint with Johnny because he was "behind the bar" and the GM involved was obviously at fault because you can't pickpocket someone who's behind a bar. *shrug*. It's a pissy little mistake, granted, but it didn't warrant the assreaming Johnny gave the GM who did it nor the level of attention it was given in general.
The vague incident: I didn't pay much attention to this one, here's the story other admin tell. Again Gunnar had a run-in with thieves, perhaps not stealing from him, but nevertheless, stealing while in the Drome. Within minutes, and down on Red, WJF NPC's are all over it. Who's puppeting them? Johnny. Now, don't get me wrong, but this is just downright dubious. How often have you seen WJF NPC's down on Red? How often do the staff or patrons of the Drome call the WJF or even show them the slightest acknowledgement? And also, how often does Johnny puppet NPC's?
Personally I'd have missed that one but it was brought to my attention by other admin.
Anyhow, we need some more background information on this one. Ask a GM how they get treated on SD. Ask ANY of them what they get if they ask a question or start to think for themselves. I'm not actually going to say, just please, go ahead and ask them. All I'm going to say is they get treated like SHIT and that's been a major bone of contention between myself and Johnny for a good few months. The GM's of today are the Sindome of the future, yet they're misinformed, told they have no right thinking about things or making any decisions and are frequently yelled at when they ask "why?". Apparently they're not allowed to ask "why?" because being TOLD something means the matter isn't open for any discussion and they therefor have no reason to know "why". *shrug*.
Sometime after this discussion once more returned to Gunnar getting a coder bit. I, along with other admin, expressed our concerns. Namely the fact that Johnny, already something of a tyrant, would have a second key coder who he was good RL friends with and that would lead to a major shift in the already somewhat crooked balance of power. Johnny assured us this wouldn't be a problem and Gunnar's coder bit was approved.
More incidents: FireStorm cells a player for a repeat offense. Kevlar (Gunnar in coder form), releases the player back into the game without consulting anyone. None of my business, but FS was pissed. It's admin-side ettiquette that the admin who cells a player returns that player to the game at their discretion.
Idle fucker: Idle timers. Bad juju. You all know that. Gunnar was warned twice for using idle timers to earn 500 chyen/hour in Burnt Cow. He finally stopped when he was celled by FS for having and idle timer sending "work" to the MOO periodically while he wasn't even IN Burnt Cow but instead sitting in his cube. Use of idle timers netted him 11k in one week, more than the Street Judges get paid.
Throwing it all away: Kevlar decided he was going to recode throw, I caught this in my backlog one day and paged him asking him to leave throw to me. He asked why, I said because it needed tying into the combat system for thrown weapons. He said no problem, he'd recode throw and I could add the weapon logic in later. I said no, leave it for me. He said... I said... He said... I said... Went on for a while before he finally stopped bugging me about it. Hmm, a 1 week old coder questioning a Justice? Hey, I don't usually pull the power trip rank thing on the lower admin, but that's just not the done thing. I refer you back to the topic of GM's being told to mind their own fucking business when they're so bold as to ask "why?".
I won't bring up the mess you made of plant, Kevlar. Just wanted you to be aware I left it (well, at least the details) out on purpose. Yes, you're a new coder and still finding your footing. I know I made some lousy fuckups when I started coding, but hey, you're Johnny's messiah who's here to save the dome from bad code. Looked like a bunch of Bishopcode to me. Wouldn't want you to point out that your a superior professional coder again tho, would I? What was it you felt the need to tell me the other day? Something about how you'd own me at C++? *shrug* Thanks. For a second I thought I'd just be able to pick up C++ for the first time and code like a pro, good job you informed me how much better you are at it.
Anyhow, that was a bitter vent... �
Yes, I'm very bitter. But not because of all this, no, this was all trivialities that I'm simply bringing up as background to the main event.
To Be Continued.... (don't you just hate it when they do that?)
(Edited by Rastus at 10:07 am on Mar. 23, 2002)
Anyhow, so now we skip forward again to the day Nixxi had her argument with Johnny about her not belonging on Damon's MOO. Maybe a couple of hours after that and I'm dealing with a GM issue. There's been a complaint about one of the GM's and he's logged on so I'm talking to him about it and his contribution to the MOO. We're talking on bit-chat because we're the only admin on so it doesn't really matter. Then Kevlar logs on. I port to the GM I'm talking to and suggest we continue the conversation in private because it wasn't a public conversation. It was an 'official' conversation regarding the GM's place on the MOO. The GM agrees and disconnects from the admin channel, which is something we -very- rarely do unless we specifically don't want to talk to someone.
Kevlar catches one line of the conversation on the bit-chat and involves himself. I ask him to leave it because it doesn't concern him and he TELLS me that he decides what concerns him, he's decided this concerns him and I have no right to tell him otherwise. Next I tell him to back off, again he persists. Wanting to finish the conversation in peace I boot him from the MOO and temporarily change his password.
Within minutes he's booted across his office to Johnny's desk where Johnny kindly gives him a new password and he comes back to start bugging again. By this time any hope of me finishing the convo I was having with the GM has gone out of the window and it pretty quickly turns into a full blown argument. I honestly wish I had a log of the whole conversation. I know there's a log of Kevlar's side of the conversation in the SD security archives but as a wizzen I was exempt from the security logging. What followed? Varying levels of dispute, me saying Fuck alot (does that surprise you?) and Kevlar informing me that I'm suffering from depression, possibly because of a low blood/sugar problem and am mentally unstable. Seriously. His words. I spent most of my time after that goading him for more and asking him if he was finished, he said he was far from finished but didn't actually say anything else until after I disconnected.
When I got home from work, in a happy and dandy mood, I started reading backlog and find it full of more of the same bullshit from Kevlar along with a statement that I was simply abusing him to get revenge on Johnny for his argument with Nixxi. Now THAT's the kicker. Here's where I go into rant mode. Here's where I see nothing but a red mist and get the urge to go postal.
I am SICK and TIRED of ANY implication that my actions on the MOO are EVER favorable or swayed because Nixxi is my wife. I'm SICK AND MOTHERFUCKING TIRED OF HEARING IT FROM JOHNNY AND I SURE AS HELL WILL NOT TAKE IT FROM A FUCKING TWO WEEK OLD ADMIN WHO DOESN'T KNOW HIS FUCKING ASS FROM HIS ELBOW…. there... no, wait, there's MORE...
You know what that's saying? That's saying I CHEAT. That's saying I -ABUSE- my admin status to favor someone. It's also, on many occasions, been downright insulting and disrespectful of Nixxi, treating her as an extension of me. Johnny has, on several occasions, kicked me off the MOO because Nixxi was sat at the keyboard while I was sat 10 feet away on the couch asking her to type stuff for me between her playing the game as her player alt. Why? Because it's a "security risk". Fuck that. That's why you see my "Fuck you and Fuck JohnnyMOO" post after the post where Johnny lumped mine and Nixxi's departure together as a group thing. Have problems acknowledging and respecting women, Johnny? It disgusts me. Johnny and Nixxi argue all the time on the MOO and maybe 75% of the time I agreed with JOHNNY. I've had bitter raging arguments with my WIFE because she's said something detrimental or insulting about Johnny. I've bitched at her for coining the term JohnnyMOO, justifying his attitude because, yes, he IS the archwiz. Fuck, I've even ended up sleeping on the couch on at least 3 occasions because I've not supported my WIFE in her opinions about the MOO. You know what? I once told my WIFE to go back to CS where she belonged because we didn't need her crap RP on Sindome. FUCK, two weeks ago if you'd said you can keep Sindome or your wife, I'd have had a tough fucking time making that decision. Don't believe me? Ask Nixxi. Ask her how many times this MOO has led to MASSIVE arguments between me and her. To fucking well imply that I'm attacking an admin because someone upset my wife is a FUCKING INSULT. Calling me mentally unstable is a FUCKING INSULT. Having a two week old admin challenge my decisions is a FUCKING INSULT. But hey, it's Johnny's "buddy" so what the fuck does that matter? And he defends himself by saying I was insulting HIM. What did I say that was so insulting? I said FUCK more than a few times? You find that INSULTING? It's a word. FUCK FUCK FUCK. Fuck you, fuck your mother, fuck your grandmother. If the word fuck insults you then FUCK YOU. You know what's more amusing? Johnny -supported- Kevlar's defence that I insulted him when not more than a few hours previous he'd used FUCK -several- times while bitching a GM out for an IC mistake with his player alt.
FUCK... damnit, how do I make my font bigger on this FUCKING forum? I want a full fucking screen FUCK YOU specially for Kevlar to call his own. You insult me, you insult my wife and you insult my integrity as a Sindome admin.
Anyhow... as you've probably gathered, I was pretty livid. I spat a few choice words at Kevlar and he once more implied I was attacking him because I was defending my wife. Then I snapped...
Honestly? I was shaking with anger. I kicked him off the MOO again and changed his password, but in my fury that wasn't enough. I could picture that fucker scurrying across his office to Johnny's desk because bad Rastus had booted him again, so, bypassing all the various restrictions on @recycling of player objects, I abused my wizbit and recycled him...
It wasn't permenant, I knew that, but it was the only way to express my anger that was left for me. I'd put up with all I was going to from him and seen my every objection met with dismissals from Johnny. It made my point...
However... recycling admin is bad juju. It breaks things. TB's start happening. Not a good thing. Restarting the MOO would have been done anyhow to bring the fucker back, but because of the TB's it was more urgent than it might otherwise have been.
Johnny hit the kill switch and the 2 minute timer to shutdown started. I sat and seethed. Johnny started muttering on justice-net. I don't have the faintest idea what he was saying, it's lost in the rage. I remember the 30 seconds to shutdown and Johnny saying "Rastus what did you do?"
Rastus says, "i recycled him"
Johnny says, "Why would you do that?"
10 seconds to server shutdown
Rastus says, "him or me"
Johnny says, "you"
Rastus says, "k"
@quit
I shook with anger. I raged. I was blind with fury, staring at those last few lines on my screen. I came closer to losing my mind and tearing everything in my office to pieces than it's possible to describe...
and that, as they say, is that...
Unfortunately, I have more to say on the aftermath... but this has taken -much- longer than ever intended. Nixxi is home from work and I must go...
I shall finish tomorrow, assuming Johnny hasn't deleted. If it's deleted, rest assured it will be heard. Numerous people have already messaged me saying they will make sure these posts reach everyone if they're deleted. I thank you for that support. I thank you for listening to my little life. I thank you for wasting your life reading it, whatever your opinion.
Nite
(Edited by Rastus at 10:08 am on Mar. 23, 2002)
(Edited by Frank at 12:09 pm on Mar. 26, 2002)
I'll start by saying these recent problems have really made me question if Sindome is where I wanna be. �It has always been fun for me…recently lots of problems have arisen and it seems that becoming an admin actually doing that is very political,and the way things are being handled are political and I can't stand it. �I'm gonna side with Ras, Nixxi, and Damon on this one, cause....their right. �Do I want to leave sindome...no, am I close to...yeah I am, and I just hope Johnny can prove to me that these feelins I'm having are not �justified....
But I'm gonna send you a rant and link Rastus gave for me to post here, because He has been banned...
Well, here I am again. It's been a few days since I promised that I would return in some form or another with a final post and to be honest, I've not gotten round to it. Between other things, talking to various people and generally trying to get my life in order I've just not had the time or energy to continue my useless assault on Johnny's ivory tower
It's been a tough week or so, heh, I can't even remember how long it's been. It's been a seriously downer week or so and it's been a week of very little sleep. Nevertheless, through this week of personal pain came a hero. A man who I can only say has inspired me to carry on no matter how bad things look. Why? Because no matter how bad my troubles look, this is a man with a far greater burden to carry than I ever will and he's -happy-. This is a man who faces a great personal challenge and overwhelming physical disability but simply refuses to stop smiling and doing what he enjoys, dancing. He's a man with a mission and nothing anyone can do will divert him from that mission.
For the last few days I've kept this webpage open in my browser and go there whenever I feel things are getting to much. It's a link I'm passing on to anyone and everyone I meet and it's now a link I bring to you.
I give you, Mr. Nice.
That's all from ras….
I'd just like to wish you all well, and thanks so much for helping me out these days as well as the days before I went idle for…what, about six months? That goes for all admins. I always appreciate the help you offer. Thanks.
I'm sorry this happened…and not that anyone cares or reads this thread anymore, but I will miss you.
Just because I can't be bothered to hunt people down and tell them individually, those of you who were admin on and/or following the development of Shards (the project I was working on), it is no more.
Thanks to -everyone- for -everything-.
Tomorrow I make a big move. Not being with Sindome anymore has actually made me realise that my life outside of Sindome didn't exist. I had Sindome and my wife... and she too was a part of Sindome, it was part of -our- life. Mutual friends, mutual interest, Sindome was our circle.
So, yea, I don't want to get melodramatic or soppy, but basically what I'm getting around to saying is I'm heading back to the UK and -possibly/probably- may not be around/online for a significant amount of time.
I truely hope I'll still stay in touch with alot of people I've met over my time here, but I'm accepting that some of the paths now parting may never cross again. So, consider this my goodbye and thanks for all the fish.