SCO's method of business is pretty cyberpunk, so I decree these apply!
There once was a man named McBride
Who brought a great case to be tried
His stock was a hit
As Darl talked his shit
But the code he continued to hide.
To lawyers McBride was a debtor
Who sought to sue users by letter
He sued IBM
With facts few and thin
A five year old could have done better.
Darl's *nix was the first in his deal
The clones that came after he'd steal
The clones were his perks
Or derivative works
Like prior art on the wheel.
The press was the court Darl first chose
Didio just brought it new lows
One could not but wonder
Whose sheets they were under
Since both were just Microsoft hoes.
Darl claimed stolen code when he sued
With millions of lines he'd include
He must have deceived
Since no one believed
He could count to twenty one when nude.
To be purchased was Darl's major plan
Then retire and keep up his tan
IBM said, "Fuck off,
You won't be playing golf
But homeless, beside a trash can."
McBride only wanted a fee
For Linux , which always was free
His whole case was hinging
On Linux infringing
On SCO's useless IP.
Darl wanted these fees forever
For hatching a plan he thought clever
With news so infernal
While hacking the kernel
Linus said "what the fuck ever."
Who understood Darl's attack?
Surely he smoked the best crack
We were mostly appalled
Ninety-three called
Wanting their UnixWare back.
In Vegas Darl said it would be
A display of infringing IP
Boy Wonder McBride
Pitched all truth aside
What he showed was all BSD.
Darl sued everyone that he could
With contracts he misunderstood
Not even a shrink
Could teach him to think
These lawsuits just made him sport wood.
Europe thought Darl lost his mind
He tried suits there of the same kind
But Germany said
Your scam is now dead
Don't let the door hit your behind.
Darl's case was completely absurd
With years 'for a ruling occurred
It was Darl that I cursed
Asking which would come first
The end of this case or the Hurd?
Finally with the court's backing
Which Groklaw was certainly tracking
The discovery phase
Began in a haze
Since SCO's facts were so lacking.
Just seventeen files we could see
How much smaller could Darl's facts be?
In court we were glad
His case truly had
Much bigger holes than goatse.
Darl's game was just mostly extortion
Without facts, why pay him a portion?
We needed a basis
To give to Darl's cases
A retroactive abortion
Novell finally opened some doors
Telling Darl, "This code is not yours,
Now don't have a fit,
But you do not own shit"
Me thinks Novell just karma whores.
How foolish was Darl to be trying
These cases with nothing but lying
Within a short term
Judge Wells will confirm
That SCO is dying.
-Kevlar
